Give him time to grieve. Before you date a widower, you need to allow him and his children ample grieving time. He needs to release his attachment to his significant other before he can pursue another relationship.
Take it slow. Dating a widower with children requires the courting process and overall dating process to proceed at a much slower pace. The grief of losing a loved one can take time, and often can get in the way of the dating process.
Handle jealousy from the children with understanding. Often they are jealous that there is a replacement parent in the picture; therefore, you need to make them feel comfortable. Most children will be happier with their father dating if they see that the person they are dating is making him happy.
Never ask him to remove old pictures. There will always be memories of his former spouse, and you do not want him to forget the past.
Handle special dates from his past with respect. Dating a widower with children will require you to be understanding. Dates like a wife or mother’s birthday, vacations and anniversaries will come up. Know that is okay to respect those dates. Find an equal balance between remembering those special days, but not over-glorifying them.
Show the children respect. Remember that these children have lost their mother, and they are still grieving this loss. Children will not always be accepting of a new girlfriend or possible step-mother. Keep in mind that this is not a competition for who can get the most attention from their father. There will be days the children accept you and days they react to your presence. Be prepared for both; never take it personally.
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